the mid child syndrome (mcs)

This morning while I was sitting alone after Subuh prayer (the coolest and not so comfortable moment for me but it will be BETTER if it is weekend…) I came across an article about MCS (middle child syndrome) on the internet.. as a second child (middle) in the family.. I think I had it (once?).. not that I am suffering or unhappy with this MCS thingy but some of the characteristics was in me.. since I was little.. and some is still there.. (kot?)

Having a big sister which is so clever and clearly good looking than me myself is hard.. I always get compared to her in every aspects… pelajaran, sukan, pergaulan, attitude, cara pemakaian, kekemasan.. she is fairer, she is clever, hardworking, neat  and she is good in almost everything… me on the other hand is messy, a bit slow in everything (sloth) and sedikit rebel.. ok fine.. agak banyak lah.... and as the third one came into the picture, she is almost (nearly) to become the youngest in the family because the gap between her and the last one is almost 8 years.. While she were in standard one, our mom gave a birth to our youngest sisters… so it makes me the youngest to sleep separately from parents, and the one who always play alone..  Kakak is too old to layan me and younger sister is too little to play with me.. I have few cousins near my age.. it is either too old or too young.. yang ada pon 2 boys…  which is.. baik dan jauh dan tak baik tapi pon jauh.. :P

I tend to get jealous but I didn’t do anything to win the parents.. Not that I don’t want to.. I just don’t know how… if I ever tried, I’ll end up in trouble? So what I did was.. I just went out (anywhere also can) to have fun..  enjoying myself out there.. killing siput, kacau anak ayam and get hurt by falling from bikes, trees or playing with parang.. I admit pernah menjauhkan diri from my kakak.. kerana cemburu dan I don’t like di compare.. we’re not the same what.. dia kakak and saya adik.. :P and obviously.. she is better than me. we always end up quarrel, she will scold me.. and i usual will end up cursing.. nak pukul den kecik.. hehe kang naya aje kena karate.. (im too skinny masa too.. haha believe it or not.. :P)

I still remember how I used to play during hujan (because mom forbid it) and Along will follow because she is the one who follow moms order while I do what I wanted to do.. if I wanted to play I go out and play tak kira time sekolah ke bila pon.. I did not get permissions.  I don’t mind being scolded as long as I am happy with my game.. If I don’t want to go to school, no one can make me.. :P and I always makes mistake in everything that I do.. I peed in a pants in school (scared), I steal sweets from kedai behind our tadika (and not get caught!) and throw it just because it is not a sweet pon.. :p haha and I am always alone (not taking sides).. 

Still.. I have few MCS left inside me… even though being a 30+ years old auntie already (omg! Felt so old) I know both my parents loves US (4 of us) deeply .. siapa tak sayang anak but no one can deny… not every child is the same.. I know I am the most difficult one and I know I am the one with so many troubles and less achievements… I wish I could change the troubles and achievements parts (which is so not easy).. Still I am struggling to be better person.. at least for myself?  Apa2pon I just love my parents… my mom and my late dad and all my sisters he he.. Forever lah… they already accept me as a weird and unique one.. I supposed.. err yeke? 

Yeah yeah Aku Pelangi.. whatever and we’ll see how is the end… Ha Ha ha Ha i lived through this condition, it is not fatal.. just difficult.

Ps/ This is just  a rough idea of the day.. it might change tomorrow… :P or as soon as I publish this.. ^___^